On death and dying

March 6, 2010 § Leave a comment

I can hardly fathom the death of an old friend to be true. Today felt like a normal day, like everyone in my life was still intact and in this world still. I’m not sure how I went to each class today with no idea that someone so close to my family was gone. This came out of the blue and I had no idea it was coming. I realized that I take for granted all the relationships and people I have in my life. My sister made me realize through a text message that read “You think that they’ll live forever.” And it feels like we are living forever, until we lose someone close to us. It’s kinda like a punch in the face, but less bloody and painful.

But seriously. I could stare at a cute old person for so long that I start to think, “woah, they could be dead in like five seconds.” I noticed myself staring at my grandmothers skin while thinking that. There is something about old people’s skin. I remember before my grandpa died, his skin was paper thin and always bleeding. But that is just a random fact I just thought about and don’t know why I mentioned it. I guess I hadn’t realized how much I miss my grandpa until this year. So much has changed since he’s been gone. But why am I sharing this with the world on the internet?

to be continued… On life and living

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